filling the void

it's a completely ridiculous idea.

doug and i started our mono-diet last night. for the next 5 days (ending on tues night) we're going to consume nothing but brown rice, water, and sea salt. then, on tues night, and on alternate nights thereafter, we will re-introduce one food into our diets, systematically. tuesday we start with carrots. thursday it will be spinach. from there, who knows. we have yet to decide.

it's not inherently ridiculous to do something like this. it was an idea conceived with sound reasoning, we were going to test ourselves for a mild nightshade allergy (doug heard that nightshades can exacerbate rheumatic conditions via alterations of connective tissue, and thought maybe it was worth investigating given our family history and current joint complaints). but that was months ago, and circumstances (mostly the holidays) caused us to put off the plans until now. it just so happens that its timing coincides with new years, but it is far from a new year's resolution. what is that one day to provoke a resolution? these last few months have been full of them. it has nothing to do with the new year.

interestingly, it really has nothing specific to do with anything, anymore. my knee pain has been steadily decreasing over time, and i have no real reason to believe that it is or was related to my intake of nightshades, delicious and deadly tho they may be. i fully assume it is the (unsurprising) side effect of 6 months of abusive action, and likely nothing more.

which leads me to ask, why am i doing this? on the immediate level, there really is no reason. it was an idea we had conceived, and there is no good reason not to do it, so if doug is still interested (and he is) i might as well humor him and myself. some sort of bizarre fun challenge. why not?? but i find myself thinking of it in a grander sense, that it fits into other changes i have made and i hope to be able to develop these thoughts and make them coherent so that i can understand them with something deeper than a vague sense of intuition.

practically speaking: today has been not so much of a challenge. the idea of eating only one food is currently very novel. and i actually really enjoy brown rice (tho not as much as the apples i walk past every time i leave the kitchen), and so far there have been only feelings of hunger, which can be at least temporarily assuaged by eating! i do however notice that i am not inclined to eat to the point of full, but rather to the point of not being hungry, and stop (an unusual action for me), which means i am hungry again sooner, but also that i don't feel as if i have mistreated myself by gorging.